Playing with Mystery

Sheila Gill

A writer friend and teacher recently shared with me a quotation from celebrated American poet and Zen Buddhist, Jane Hirshfield.  Hirshfield writes:

“the feeling I have about poem-writing (is) that it is always an exploration, of discovering something I didn’t already know.  Who I am shifts from moment to moment, year to year.  What I can perceive does as well.  A new poem peers into mystery, into whatever lies just beyond the edge of the knowable ground.” 

Go ahead and replace ‘poem-writing’ with ‘asana practice’ here, and we have an elegant description of the creative process of heart-led Hatha yoga. Just think of Bakasana, Crane pose, and imagine yourself leaning forward, balancing on your hands, and peering out into mystery, wondering if you might just tip a bit too far into the revelation of a face plant!

For me, a challenging new yoga posture, or an old familiar pose approached on a new day, offers a peek into pure mystery, a journey of discovery.  Will I be able to hold a handstand (Adho Muka Vrksasana) for more than two steamboats today?  Maybe?  Puhleeeeze?  Maybe yes, maybe no.  (Let’s just say handstand has been kind of a hurdle for me, but I’m finally warming up to it.)  Perhaps the mystery of handstand will reveal more of itself today, or maybe the revelation will occur some day down the road when I least expect it, when life has taught me even more about hugging in to my own greatness!  Perhaps the revelation will come in good ‘ole Down Dog, when I notice my mind wandering to the grocery list, at the very moment when my left shoulder slips out of engagement with the back of my heart, and my left elbow buckles in forgetfulness

So it’s pretty cool.  Today I can perceive more of the fragmentations of my mind and body, the “vrtti” Patanjali writes about in the Yoga Sutras.  And most definitely, what I can perceive—my degree of sensitivity--has expanded since I began this amazing, generous yoga path almost exactly four years ago.  As Hirshfield puts it, “who I am shifts from moment to moment, year to year.”  At the same time, through my conscious intent to lovingly integrate all the diverse bits of me (sore hip, weak wrists, strong legs, judging mind, fear of inversions, tenacity) I have played a greater role in shaping the person I have become.  (Here it is folks!  The moment when exercise becomes yoga!)  Mind you, I have no illusions about running the show. (Recall an implication of the First Principle of Anusara® yoga: Grace is in the driver’s seat!).  That said, I am willing to take my turn at the wheel when conscious choice is required.  (And when, pray tell, is it not?)

This week I invite you to come practice with Vicki and I, as we invite you again and again to peer into the wonderful, messy, beautiful mystery of yourself.   Keep coming to class and you will begin to feel stronger, more flexy, and friends will definitely start noticing that you stand taller, feet parallel, heart lifted (ha!).  But most cool is that you will get revved up on the inside about the ‘raw material of your own promise’ (from “Jealousy of Trees” by Francette Cerulli.).  

Every day may you wake up more curious about seeking out, in the stuff of your own life, more of what lay “just beyond the edge of your knowable ground”.  Welcome sweet Spring, welcome yoga, and bring on the juiciness!

Namaste,
Sheila Dawn Gill
Anusara®-Inspired Teacher